The Writer


William Sauro


CAPOTE THE WRITER 



“Remember, first of all,
 that no one in the larger 
world cares whether you 
write or not.  If you want 
to write, it is you and you 
alone who must create the 
space, that will make 
writing possible.”
—Paul Russell, author of
THE UNREAL LIFE OF
SERGEY NABOKOV
_____________________

Which is what Capote did—
in order to survive way Out There

Gawd knows Truman was—
strange & outré enough as it was
__________________

He needed Harper Lee desperately—
to accompany him Out There

Because that’s what it really was—
compared with New York City
_____________

He simply loved & adored NYC—
loved the feel of pavement under

His heels going clickity-click down—
busy classy chic Fifth Avenue
_______________

Major thoroughfare of Manhattan—
Fifth Avenue crossing Midtown 

Especially 49th Street to 60th Street—
lined with prestigious shops & resaurtants
_________________

After all, isn’t that where Tiffany’s was—
the "most expensive street in the world"?

Once he’d done that, go figure what—
really matters to a writer like Capote
_________________

Doesn’t it seem strange to you that—
he’d give William Shawn a call right away?

After reading the little article there—
that morning in The New York Times?
_____________________

Why would Capote even want to—
go out there to that godforsaken hell?

And be on the Santa Fe Super Chief—
with Harper Lee as soon as possible?
_________________

Was it literary ambition that drove him—
desire for GONE WITH THE WIND fame?

Wanting to be America’s very own Valentin—
Louis Georges Eugène Marcel Proust?
_________________

Surely smart critics saw thru his façade—
Capote’s whole Non-Fiction Novel fantasy?

Ending up writing about it as if his life—
depended on it (because, in fact, it did)?





Out There


OUT THERE 



http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=Unmsm95e5vk&NR=1 

Is there any way of possibly—
describing the High Plains out there?

There’s no way of describing it—
CAPOTE wasn't ready for it at all
__________________

The bleakness, the lonely starkness—
IN COLD BLOOD a living Nightmare

SANTA FE track straight thru town—
some tall white Grecian grain elevators
________________

They called it OUT THERE—
and there’s a reason why they did

Between Kansas and Colorado—
there’s nothing but a vast Nothingness
_________________

Not that that bothers anybody living—
out there on the surface of the Moon

The sky looks down on mere humanity—
just like it did on the stoic Indians 
________________

Endless fields of golden wheat fields—
out there where the horizon never ended

Did Holcomb or Garden City—
really even exist in that terrible Void?
____________

The sky looms high overhead—
did it really care for anything down there?

OUT THERE was faraway from anything—
It was where NOTHINGNESS ruled
_________________

It’s hard to comprehend sheer Nothingness—
especially to a Brooklyn Heights writer

And yet this is what happened, baby—
Capote brought it back to the Big Apple 









THE BLACK AND WHITE BALL



Capote & Marilyn Monroe: The Black and White Ball

THE BLACK AND WHITE BALL 





—Christopher Bram, Eminent
Outlaws: The Gay Writers
Who Changed America

The Black and White Ball—
of course, it wasn’t real

How could it exist anymore—
than IN COLD BLOOD?
_____________

Chic critics mocked the idea—
scoffed and pooh-poohed it

How could a novelist possibly—
leave himself out of his novel?
________________

Are we so bankrupt, they said—
so avid for decadent escape?

That we stoop to enjoy a—
NATIONAL ENQUIRER exposé?
______________

So VOGUE jaded that we must—
Ogle at HOLLYWOOD CONFIDENTIAL?

Surely IN COLD BLOOD is just —
a mere piece of schlocky gossip?
_____________

A morbid dizzy kitschy piece of—
insipidly snarky yellow journalism?

Shame on Miss Capote for her— 
wicked satire of Holcomb, Kansas
__________

Doing her stylish sophisticated—
NEW YORKER take on such a tragedy

Glorifying those two ex-con killers—
as if murder be so tres cosmopolitan
______________

Just as boring and ordinary as—
some Big Apple ho-hum homicide? 

Worming his way nefariously into—
the confidences of Perry & Hickcock
______________

Cold blooded as the two ex-cons—
so devoted to his murder melodrama

Living out there on the High Plains—
in a lonely Garden City dingy motel
____________

Harper Lee as his Fag Hag diplomat—
ingratiating himself to get the Story

Bribing his way into Lansing Prison—
schmoozing out all the juicy details?
______________

Patiently waiting for the inevitable—
Noose Party at the jerky climax?

No wonder Capote became alcoholic—
all to get on the NYTimes bestseller list
______________

Intensely knotted up in fear—
full of self-pity and survivor’s guilt?

Hardly, my dears, get real—
she couldn’t wait for them to die
________________

So she could finally become—
The Great American Proust!!!

Throwing her splendidly sordid—
Black and White Ball to celebrate!!!




Things Get Worse


Mapplethorpe's Truman Capote


THINGS GET WORSE 




—Edmund White, SACRED MONSTERS

Miss Capote kept shuffling in & out—
taking snorts of coke in his bathroom

Mapplethorpe had come & gone—
after taking his pics that hot afternoon
________________________

The air-conditioning wasn’t working—
Truman’s palmetto fan was tres busy

Capote seemed like a little old lady—
fanning herself there in church
__________________

“It’s a horrible life, dontchaknow”—
he kept saying over & over again

And if anybody should know—
surely it was Miss Truman Capote
_______________

No more ANSWERED PRAYERS—
not for her anymore at least

She’d burned all her bridges—
after "La Cote Basque" in ESQUIRE
____________________

Not even ex-cons trusted him—
after scandalous IN COLD BLOOD

''What did they expect?'' Truman said—
''I'm a writer, and I use everything!!!”
___________________

“Did all those people think I was—
there just to entertain them?''

Both High Society & the Criminals—
didn’t much like their Beads being read 
______________

The so-called great American Proust—
ending up taking a big Swan Dive

All his film scripts, plays, reportage—
all his poems, novellas and novels
____________________

Couldn’t put Miss Humpty-Dumpty—
back together ever again




Things Get Better





THINGS GET BETTER 


—for Dan Savage

“You can't go 
home again” 
―Thomas Wolfe
You Can’t Go Home Again
_______________

Who wants to go back home—
back to that hellhole of losers?

They’re the biggest losers of all—
stop wasting your time even trying
_________________

Does it really get better—
like Savage says in The Stranger?

I doubt it, I doubt it seriously—
back home is just fucking hell
____________

Back home be str8t romantic love—
back home be a closet-case dream

So much for all that fuckin bullshit—
back home be just another name for exile
__________________

There’s No Escape from New York—
San Francisco or Los Angeles

No escape to Europe or some foreign land—
no home for lyricism, except yourself
___________________

Get selfish & real about it, that’s all—
back home to your own Destination

To your own youthful idea of 'freedom'—
all that’s self-sufficient about yourself
________________

Forget 'art' and 'beauty' and 'love'—
all that shit about some str8t ivory tower

Go back home to home inside yourself—
the country of the blind, deaf and dumb
_______________

Forget Fire Island and Key West—
all those gay mythological hangouts

Forget about Tennessee Williams—
Elizabeth Bishop, Miss Auden, Isherwood
____________________

They couldn’t get away from all that strife—
Anymore than you can, it’s simple

First, forget your mother and father—
you already lost them a long time ago
________________

Stop looking for peer group approval—
whoever they were can’t help you now

Save yourself lotsa time, ease the burden—
you don’t wanna go back home ever again
________________

All those old forms and systems of things—
once guilting & haunting you to death

They seemed everlasting but they’re always—
changing all the time escaping all of us
_________________

Back to the real home that’s really you—
your Great Escape into Time and Memory





In Cold Blood




WELCOME TO KANSAS 


IN COLD BLOOD
KILLER TOWN
MIDWEST FILM NOIR
SANTA FE NIGHTMARE
__________

IN COLD BLOOD

The two killers—
shopped awhile in Emporia

Buying some rope & tape—
for murdering the Clutter family

On their way through town—
there at Haines Hardware

Then west to Holcomb—
desolate High Plains Hell

Dick Hickock & his buddy—
Perry Smith both ex-cons

Capote showing up later—
IN COLD BLOOD into a movie

At the Granada Theater—
up there on the Marquee

Emporia a Killer Town—
in a bloody Killer State
__________

KILLER TOWN

Raped by the Civil War—
Free State or Slave State?

Quantrill’s Raiders riding—
across the Missouri Border

Killing, burning towns—
just like the Kansans did

The only good Indian be—
a dead one Kansans said

Lorna Anderson killed—
her husband one dark night

The good Reverend Byrd killed—
his lovely wife in cold blood 

Hit her on the head with a—
Cheap bottle of Bonét champagne

Dumped her off the bridge—
down into the Cottonwood River
__________

MIDWEST FILM NOIR

Midwest film noir killers—
once a vast Inland Sea

Full of prehistoric monsters—
from the Gulf up to Canada

Fly Over State to most people—
Flying from NYC to LA

Danger lurks way down there—
Killer State full of the Living Dead 

All is not well in the Sunflower State—
pretty meadowlarks singing in Hell

Murder & Death lurking down there—
Killers kill & Breeders breed more

The more killers the better—
way down there in Tornado Alley

Just like Lorna Anderson & her—
Lover the good Reverend Byrd 

MURDER ORDAINED a fine Lutheran—
TV movie for the while family to watch

Popcorn, candy, a six-pack or two—
better than even a Sat football game!!!
__________

SANTA FE NIGHTMARE

Ain’t no Pot of Gold—
at the End of the Rainbow

Just ask dead Dorothy—
sitting on her toilet

Judy Garland found dead—
in her locked bathroom

Shooting up & then dying—
after overdosing herself

No Wizard of Oz anymore—
no more Wicked Witch of the East

No more Glenda the Good Witch—
no more magic Ruby Slippers

No More cute little Munchkins—
no more Lions, Tigers & Bears!

Just me getting born in Emporia—
plopped down by the Santa Fe tracks

My cow-patty shitty existence—
in that crummy little cow-town

In that fucked-up Fly Over State—
before I got the Fuck Outta There



American Wedding




AMERICAN WEDDING 


—for Ahmos Zu-Bolton

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=bIbLvf-SdrI#!
_______________

“In america,
I place my ring
on your cock
where it belongs”
—Essex Hemphill
_____________________

Let’s get real, man—
no more Down Low, baby

Hidin it all the time—
when ya know what be
_____________

Let Black Love be real—
as real as Black Beauty

No more banned marriages—
TABOO for anybody NOW
_________________

Be TABOO if ya wanna be—
but it aint gonna be me 

Mixed marriages be kosher—
it’s time for GLBT folks now
_____________

Truman got rid of it—
after WWII in the Military

Obama got rid of it—
when he ditched DADT
______________

DON’T ASK DON’T TELL—
“Always keep it hidden!!!”

Livin our lives in the Shadows—
like crummy CLOSET CASES
________________

Doin it but not like—
flaunting it, dontchaknow

The STR8TS now be—
The REAL CLOSET CASES
_____________

No more Closets—
No more hiding any lifestyle

No more pretending STR8T—
locked up in Straitjacket Denial
______________

It’s time everybody gets to—
Share American Citizenship

That gold ring means one thing—
Time for all of us to be AMERICANS
___________

NO MORE SLAVERY to Race—
or Color or Sex or Religion 

Can Black folk still turn against—
their own gay brothers & sisters?
_________

Slowly the Civil War gotta BE—
what Lincoln said it BE

We can’t treat each other—
like SLAVES anymore








Voodoo




DAZZLE 


“Mrs. Ferguson was said to
have magical powers.”
—Truman Capote, “Dazzle,”
PORTRAITS AND OBSERVATIONS
_______________

Years later in New York—
I kept being haunted by the Witch

It was all about feeling guilty—
for stealing my grandmother’s necklace
__________________

But it was more than just that tho—
I kept suffering from “missing time”

Mrs. Ferguson had hypnotized me—
swinging that necklace like a pendulum
________________

Back and forth over her head so that—
I plunged into a dazzling darkness

SPINDAZZLESPINSPINDAZZLEDAZZLE—
then I woke up back in the Garden District
___________________

In front of my house but I didn’t know how—
or who brought me back there that Sunday

All I could remember was her laughter—
sitting there rocking in her rocking chair
_________________

Even tho she be long gone & dead—
She still be the Big Easy Voodoo Witch

People came to her for spells & wishes—
marriages, business deals, getting even
________________

My problem was different than that tho—
I couldn’t tell anybody else but her

I told her I didn’t wanna be a boy—
I wanted to be a girl instead dontchaknow
__________________

“Well,” she drawled, “you sure be—
prettier than any boy oughtta be…”

So just like that she know my Secret—
she read my Beads and smiled…
_______________

“You’re a dumb little faggy son of a bitch—
C’mon honey, bein a girlie boy aint that bad!”

I was simply outraged, shocked to death—
how dare that old Witch call me a queer!!!
_______________

She laughed and then started the game—
swinging my grandmother’s lovely necklace

The one with the rubies, diamonds, pearls—
with the big yellow Sapphire glowing bright
_________________

“This is what you’ve always wanted, honey”—
SPINDAZZLESPINSPINDAZZLEDAZZLE

The old Voodoo Witch, she hypnotized me—
some sort of strange escape fantasy
_________________

She be good at it, disguising herself like—
some dumb old know-nothin washer-woman 

Dat’s how HooDoo survived in the Big Easy—
all that Creole, French, Spanish, Afro-Magic…
_________________

So she know my deepest, hidden secret—
but I don’t remember what happened next

All I know is that I paid for it with that—
valuable necklace of my poor grandmother
______________________

Years later after coming up to the Big Apple—
I’d forgotten all about New Orleans back then

But then one night at a Manhattan party—
I got higher than a kite on some opium
_________________

Plus the usual coke and weed that comes—
with a cocktail party in some fancy penthouse

It was then that I had this DAZZLING flashback—
all the way back then to what really happened
___________________

After hypnotizing me with the yellow sapphire—
swinging the necklace back and forth

The witch took me outta the parlor down—
de hallway into this dark bedroom
_______________________

There this Creole kid not much older than me—
handsome Skeeter young son of the Witch

He be stretched out in bed waiting for me—
without his T-shirt or sailor’s trousers
____________________

He’d been drinking rum with the Witch—
getting ready for the usual slow fuck

Mother and son incest didn’t mean nothin’—
not to a Voodoo Queen and her studly Son
___________________

She like the young stuff & Skeeter be—
de offspring of a stoned Voodoo rendezvous

He be the one that came & got me to see—
his mother the Voodoo Witch who knew all
________________

She had a lotta Secrets hidden in her mind—
it be easy for her to read my mind & know

SPINDAZZLESPINSPINDAZZLEDAZZLE—
Skeeter be the sharp-eyed hoodlum type
_________________

Sneering at what his Mama bring him—
smirking Creole blowin smoke rings

Lookin up at the ceiling bored smokin—
a big fat thick expensive Cuban cigar
__________________

He fucked me all that afternoon—
no need for sermons or singing anymore

He got me good where it really hurts—
after awhile tho it kinda felt real good
_____________

The way I fainted 2 or 3 times straight—
made me realize bein a gay boy be pretty good

It must’ve been the coke and opium—
plus the usual double-martinis dontchaknow
__________________

Provoking my DAZZLING FLASHBACK, baby—
talk about Fast Forward Replay Climax!!!

It was then I suddenly realized thanks to—
the Voodoo Queen intuition of Mrs. Ferguson
_________________

That all I really needed was to be me—
the man who I was = a man who loved men…

After getting continuously reamed—
inside-out by handsome studly Skeeter
_________________

I finally realized the most simple thing—
with each stroke up my fuckin nelly ass

This was Mrs. Ferguson’s gift to me—
professionally delivered so very adroitly
___________

Effortlessly fuckin me to death, baby—
inseminating me with de Voodoo truth…

SPINDAZZLESPINSPINDAZZLEDAZZLE—
it all be worth the fuckin necklace






STRIPTEASE




STRIPTEASE  


"STEP RIGHT UP LADIES!!! And this show be for LADIES only!!!” 

“We got handsome dancing Studs just waitin’ inside—and they can’t wait to show you Ladies just what they GOT!!!”
________________________

“Yes, Ladies, you be lucky indeed tonight—cause you’re gonna get to see GOOD STUFF right here in the Big Tent!!! THIS be the Place where we got the World’s Best Male Striptease Show tonight!!! They’re gonna make your tongues hang out Ladies, yes indeed!!!” 

“These guys be SERIOUS about their SLEAZY MALE ENDOWMENTS!!! And they’ll definitely make your nice sweet hot Pussies—damp and weak as one of your dishcloths back home in the kitchen!!!” 
__________________________

”These Handsome Young Hung STUDS love their WORK—and they can't wait to do the Male Striptease Hootchie Kootchie for all you ladies inside!!! Girls, you’ll get to see things you NEVER EVER dreamed possible!!! They’ll Wiggle their Ass and Flop out their Meat all the way just for you!!! Everything you wanna to see in a Real Man—and then some too!!!” 

"They’re gonna let you see how they move every Naked Muscle—especially that Big Gorgeous Muscle down there between their Strong Legs!!! They be BIG, BAD & BEAUTIFUL, Ladies!!! You won’t be disappointed housewives any longer—this be your Big Night to go SIZE-QUEEN all the way, Ladies!!!
______________________

"This be the Show you've all heard about. This be the Male Striptease Show they all been talkin about. You’ll never forget what you’ll see inside our Tent tonight, Ladies. It be the Twelve Inch Wonders of the Known World inside—there’s nothin anywhere like it in Peoria or Topeka!!! C’mon Ladies, Step Right up!!! Now’s the Time to See It All!!!”

“Here they come now, gentlemen!!! These Ladies out here are just dying to see what ya got. I know ya won’t disappoint them—I know you’re warmed up and ready for the Show. C’mon right inside, Ladies—the Big Show be ready to Begin!!!”




PINHEAD




PINHEAD 


“A bitter pessimism about
the possibilities of human
interaction pervades Tod
Browning’s work.”
—David Skall & Elias Savada
DARK CARNIVAL
____________________________

Pearls before Swine—
Jewels in the Carnie Sawdust

It really turns me on, baby—
gimme your PINHEAD LOVE!!!
________________

Talk to me sexy FREAKY—
Be Mother Nature’s BIG MISTAKE

Handsome MUTANT MAN—
right up my fuckin’ alley, baby
___________________

My FUKASHIMA BOYFRIEND—
got ya in that TOKYO Nightclub

SUSHI STUD so exquisitely fine—
real nice piece of LIVE EVIL EEL 
______________

I like it raw naked fresh—
even tho it be awful expensive

Your Yakuza Sugar Daddy—
pimpin' you out for $10,000