New Scouting Fashions


“Social theorists speak of the "scavenging aesthetic" of modern fashion, of designers rooting around among "the archaeology of modernity" for hints and motifs and antiquated garments that resonate now, of how the modern doubles back on itself, as the past returns to "disturb and unsettle the confidence of the modern."—PETER POPHAM, “Fashion and Fascism—A Love Story,” The Independent, 3/06/2011

What could be more fashionable today than—
resurrecting worn-out old Boy Scouting USA?

What could be more decadent, my dears—
than a haughty Hitlerjungend Fashion Show?

What could simply be more tres de rigueur—
than designing nouveau Scouting Haute Couture?

What could be more kitschy & kosher—
than some cute sexy Hitler Youth models?

What could be more chic & up-to-date—
than some new Young Republicans in drag?

Throw in the Religious Right & Repugs too—
Rename “GOP” as the “Gay Old Party”!!!

What could simply be more exciting and—
challenging than today’s lazy Slacker youth?

Getting them off their slovenly fat asses—
into the Disco Cages of Gay Bars once again?

Surely Boy Scouting hasn’t gone out of style—
let those antiquated garments resonate anew!

Scavenging & rooting around those campfires—
giving the boyz a new breeder fascist face lift!

Let the Boy Scout Past double back on itself—
returning to disturb & unsettle us once again

Shaking the confidence of Boring Bourgeoisie—
queer heteronormative Boy Scouts in drag!!!

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