Zombieland (2009)

Zombieland (2009)


In a world overrun by Zombies—what’s a girl to do?
You get your shit together—get ready for the Zoo???
Pretend it’s horror comedy—Killer Klowns from Outer Space???

When the Shit hits the fan—watcha gonna do, girl?
When there’s no Toilet Paper left—to wipe your ass?
When your 401K is gone—along with your house?

When the Banks go bankrupt—and close their doors?
When the Electricity goes off—and Youtube stops?
When the Earth Stands Still—watcha gonna do, girl?

When the Useless Eaters—suddenly become Zombies?
When Wal-Mart and Safeway—close their doors?
When FOX-News assholes—no longer grin at you?

Watcha gonna do, girl—when Woody Harrelson
Shows up and tells you—it’s time for a long ride
A cross-country Pilgrimage—to the Other Side?

You gonna be another fucking—Zombie Klown huh?
You gonna be a Killer Klown from Outer Space?
You gonna wait for Plastic Coffins—to come your way?

Watcha gonna do, girl—when things get really bad?
Like Night of the Living Dead—only ten times worse?
Think you’re safe under your bed—think again, honey!!!

How to survive in a world—overrun by Zombies?
But this time it ain’t just a Gang Bang of Living Dead
Zombie mayhem’s got a new gig—Escape from New York?

Life goes on they say—even for the Living Dead
Funny how horror flicks—always end up Comedy
Like Abbott & Costello—Meet Frankenstein, etc.

Not another American post-apocalyptic skin-flick?
Not another Zombie comedy about the Living Dead?
Not another Zombie Plague—predicting the Future?

Not quite, my dear—it’s much worse than that…
These aren’t the sluggish Walking Dead of yesterday
Not the George Romero type—of Living Undead

The Zombies of Zombieland—they’re not dead yet
Super jacked-up like—“Dawn of the Dead” (2004)
They’re scary, gnarly, gross—they wanna eat you!!!

They’re ferocious and infected Creeps on the march
They’re not undead yet—like old horror show creeps
They’re like “28 Days Later”—they wanna get laid

They give new meaning—to having oral sex!!!
Eating out the way they do—get ready to scream!!!
They got Roter-Rooter tongues—Drano eyeballs!!!

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