Brainiac (1963)

Brainiac (1963)

Don’t wanna be The Blob???—neither do I!!!
I prefer Mexican horror movies—the ultimate schlock
Run, don’t walk—to your local YouTube in town
Watch a few clips of—Brainiac (El barón del terror)
It’s ten times as bad as—any Ed Wood Jr. movie

It’s even better than—Plan 9 From Outer Space
It makes Attack of the Giant Shrews—look cheesy
It makes Last Year at Marienbad—look hoity-toity
It even puts The Wasp Woman—to skanky shame
Bride of Frankenstein—pales in comparison

Plus the translation is simply awful—pure trash
Talk about “Found Camp”—just waiting to happen
The hilarious dialog—how could it be so “stilted?”
Could any comedian dream up—anything so crazy?
And that Baron of Terror—his evil wiggly tongue!!!

With his long obscene wiggling forked tongue
The Baron of Terror—lives up to his name
He’s an effete gourmet—of human brains
A Mexican aristocrat—he likes cute dames
Especially tasty screamy medulla oblongata!!!

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