Saturday, January 19, 2013

Black Narcissus


“The most scandalous of 
all of Buñuel’s films, surreal
dreamlike and deliberately
pornographically blasphemous”
—Pauline Kael

BLACK NARCISSUS—a rarely seen exquisitely obscene and scurrilously surrealist film—paid for and seen only by a few rich patrons of the nefarious Salvador Dali collaborating with his gay Spanish lover Garcia Lorca in Paris.

It was filmed in a little-known Paris male bordello in 1931—sometime between UN CHIEN ANDALOU and L’AGE D’OR. Luis Buñuel was busy with his next film after UN CHIEN ANDALOU—and it was Dali who emphatically declined to continue with Buñuel’s more political anti-religious second surrealist film L’AGE D’OR.

Dali and Lorca were not that interested in Andre Breton’s Second Surrealist Manifesto anyway—nor with Buñuel’s concerns with framing the irrational automatic writing of dreams within a more narrative mise-en-scene context such as L’AGE D’OR.

The Catholic Church’s problems in Spain—the political upheavals of the approaching Civil War. The poverty and misery of most of Spain’s lower classes—and the hypocrisy of the Church. All this had provoked Buñuel to dress up like a nun or priest in drag and scandalize busloads of shocked Parisian passengers—with his slutty anti-religious sexual behavior and trashy fag noir theatrics.

These politicized undercurrents in almost all of Buñuel’s future films—these surrealist socialist soap operas didn’t particularly appeal to Dali or Lorca. So they continued with their own pet pornographic film projects—stimulated by their gay relationship which Buñuel was much too str8t to thoroughly enjoy because of all his Catholic guilt trips and fuck-ups.. 

Instead Miss Dali and Miss Lorca were both much more interested in Surrealist fag amour fou—both of them frequenting a little known Parisian male bordello there in one of the more dirty disreputable slums of the city. Chez Dick Cheese offered mostly young Algerian and Sudanese male prostitutes. Both Dali and Lorca had become especially enamored with one of the sullen Sudanese youths in particular—an exceptionally photogenic Valentino-type prostitute who was well-endowed with simply shameless size.

The youth was in love with himself—and who could possibly really blame him, my dear? If Dali or Lorca were young again and endowed like him—they most certainly would’ve been as indubitably vain and in love with themselves as the moody African youth was playing all the time with himself. 

The kid’s huge manly Mandingo monster went up past his bellybutton—and when he got loaded on hash he’d faint in Lorca’s trembling arms. Consumed with fag noire amour fou—the youth was always playing with himself and cuddling his tool like it was his little newborn black licorice baby. 

Both Dali and Lorca could easily recognize a stunning young Black Narcissus—totally in love with himself when they saw one. And so they immediately made plans to do their own UN CHIEN ANDALOU film version—portraying the travails and transgressions of this well-hung narcissistic young prostitute.

“It’ll be a piece of cake,” Miss Dali remarked, sipping her tinted glass of absinthe. Miss Lorca nodded in agreement—lying on the rug after taking too many long tokes from the big brass hookah on the floor of the shameless prostitute bordello.

“And it won’t be pale pasty-white Angel Food cake either, my dear,” said Miss Dali. “Just look at that deep dark chocolate Devil’s Food piece of lovely cake, honey. His exquisitely hung fag noir beauty—it’ll fill our coffers and bank accounts with rich fag filthy lucre once my millionaire patrons get a taste of this kid’s exquisite amour fou!”

Dali soon appealed to the appropriate wealthy Parisian cognoscente as well as the filthy rich Baron von Gloeden intelligentsia. Soon they had the necessary funding for the expensive camera equipment—and early color studio film processing they had in mind. Then they began filming the seductive young Black Narcissus—doing what he did best. Giving himself hours of exceptionally obscene “69” blowjobs—endless surrealistic scenes of him going down on himself in all sorts of positions.

They used the same spontaneously oneric dream logic images—scripting the scenes according to their previous night’s nocturnal unconscious promptings. The haze of hashish and the blur of absinthe—tinted the chartreuse chiaroscuro of the shooting schedule daily.

The same irrational oneric images appeared—the kid’s hands with his palms full of worms crawling out of his petulant asshole. Breton’s homophobic ugly mouth suddenly silenced—morphed into the kid’s hairy armpit squelching Miss Breton’s protestations.  

Then the Sudanese youth tied up in bed—his arms and legs spread-eagled in the oozing stony moonlight. A close-up shot of Lorca’s cheesy lips smeared with cum and smegma—having sucked the kid’s writhing anaconda meat down to the last gauche greedy squirt.

Even years later in 2013, the shocked audience at Cannes couldn’t believe it—ogling at the rare footage of this recently released shocking Dali-Lorca screening at the Cannes Film Festival. A riot broke out just as it did in Paris during the Thirties—it was seen live on CNN and FOX-News in America.

All the famous cineastes at the prestigious  Cannes Festival—suddenly became possessed by some strange revisitation of ghostly mad fag noire amour fou. Famous Hollywood directors and important LA producers—immediately sensed the lucrative possibilities of such a new Fag Surrealism cinema. 

Quick as you could blink your razor-sliced Ogling Eyeball—this new Dali-Lorca high definition restoration version of “Black Narcissus” was made available at WalMart. And also through The Criterion Collection—a series of famous forgotten unimportant classic films out of the past.

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